Pirate Parenting

With all the self-help books out there, it isn't any wonder that another, more helpful, book should emerge. Enter Pirate Parenting by Tim Bete. As one who admires the art of parody, I decided to take a gander at this unique parenting book. I mean, who isn't curious about pirates and their parenting techniques? Pirates had to be children first, they didn't start out that way. Thanks to Pirate Parenting, the underground world of raising a pirate has surfaced for the rest of us. No longer is it a dirty little secret only known among a select few. Now we can raise our little pirates out in the open. The book lays out the parenting tips in an easy to follow guide for new parents.
This book would make a great baby shower gift. You certainly wouldn't have to worry about the recipient already getting one. Also, humor is the greatest gift of all. Everyone knows an expectant mother needs all the humor she can get before the baby arrives. Better yet, give the book to the expectant father, who really needs a good laugh after putting up with the expectant mother for nine months.
From the publisher:
In Guide to Pirate Parenting you’ll learn:
• Ten benefits of raising a pirate
• At what age your child should be able to remove a bottlecap by taking out his glass eye and using it as an opener
• Which offense requires administering The Flying Dutchman Wedgie
• How to prevent sogging the quartermaster
• The best place to maroon your disobedient child
• How to remove chewing gum or a giant octopus from your child’s hair
• The difference between plundering and pillaging
• How to convert your minivan into a pirate schooner

Corny? yes, dull, no! Hey, if you don't like it after shelling out your hard earned money for it, you can always kidnap the author and make him walk the plank. At the very least, you'll feel better and know you did your part for the pirate community.
That about sums up this literary enigma full of fun and tongue-in-cheek advice. Of course, I like sock puppet shows, so what do I know?